“It hurts sometimes when you’re healing. It’s the sensation of your heart growing bigger. It’s the feel of your old scar tissue breaking up and stretching. It’s the tight and fearful knots of emotion opening up and learning to relax. Those old hurts were actually shrinking your heart with tension, the way tightness in the back can curve and distort the spine. I know it hurts, but you can learn to experience these feelings as intense sensation and simply surrender yourself; trusting that a new and better you will soon emerge. Fear and resistance will increase the pain. Love and acceptance will ease it. Let your Heart open wide. You’ll be opening up more room in your life for love.”—Dorothy Mendoza Row (via oceanroses)
“I write differently from what I speak, I speak differently from what I think, I think differently from the way I ought to think, and so it all proceeds into deepest darkness.”—Franz Kafka (via fragilediaries)
So, I was talking yesterday with my ENTJ friend and in one moment he told me he disliked how I shutted-off when we were in a group of people, how I didn’t say anything and was expressionless but when we were talking one to one I was like a different person. I was a bit surprised, because in the first place I always thought of myself as a very expressive person, hahahaha, but it seems like that’s not it, people has told me they have to look a lot to my face to try to read me but they can’t. Told him that was not always the case, sometimes I just can’t stop talking.
Thinking better about the matter, I noticed I’m a very versatile person, people affect my mood a lot. I’m very passive optimistic but I have a very strong personality. When I’m in a group of people where they are all my friends and I have a lot of confidence in each of them I don’t stop talking and I want everyone to talk too, I get energized, I have fun and enjoy when the others are feeling fine, I love smiles, I want to just protect that moment, that people. But when I don’t trust just ONE person I don’t talk at all, I don’t find fun in any comment nor I become sad or anything, when I’m in a group of people I’m not willing to know or dislike or something I’m just a shadow, I have no idea what to say and… absolute apathy, I feel nothing.
I don’t know if this is a good trait or a bad one, but I don’t feel bad about it. It’s weird… am I really an INFJ? D: yes! you are! you just fit that one! …or an INTP or an INTJ? :X Oh, whatever, I’m just me and no type will define that :P
A moderator of The INTJ Way asked me about my friendship with an INTJ. What it’s like from the INFJ perspective. This is my response
Hello. Yes I was nodding my head in agreement as I read your post. :) The only thing that I found noticeably different was that he badgered you over your emotions. I don’t do that with my INTJ, but maybe I might have a bit if I hadn’t found out about his personality type. Knowing what I know about him now and having had him open up somewhat as to how his cogs work etc, there are things I know to be pointless or a bad idea to go on about and I truly value his friendship and thus, do my best not to mess it up. Similarly I know he makes an effort to keep me satisfied with our friendship too. For example, compliments don’t come naturally to him but he knows I love them, so he has made the effort there. It’s appreciated. I find him adorable and refreshing. I personally feel that I’m better off being around someone who is outwardly pretty even keel to be around. I pick up stress easy and being around outwardly emotional people, depressed people, stressed people, has a negative effect on me. Usually when we are together we are making each other laugh or having quite fascinating conversations that span many topics. Our differences tend to either make me chuckle or fascinate me rather than cause much angst. :)
I think the awesome thing in INTJs is that they can put you in your place when you’re overreacting or being too emotional/dramatic, they don’t “side” you in a problem, they talk objetively and then yes, they are fun :D
Oh, an ENFP! do you know anything about INTP emotional outbursts? and mood swings?
sorry guys got caught up in a voice acting group of mine oops;
INTPs, I’m not sure if I know anything about…
Oh, thank you very much for the words, I asked not for me but my friend. She is having suddenly these issues. She tells me she becomes depressed suddenly, with no reason aparently and she can’t manage to control her emotions and they change easily. She used to be happy go lucky before but now it’s like a mountain of feelings and nor me nor her know what’s happening. She doesn’t understand the logic in her behaviour. For example, she gets jeaous with her boyfriend or feels suddenly in the need to make drama for an insignificant detail. Do you know by any chance, what could be happening? I used to think she had developed a very strong feeling side but I’m not sure anymore…